‘Freedom’ we all long for freedom. Freedom from the bondages that we entangle our selves with, freedom from the mistakes we have made and freedom from all the desires that have stuck with us. We are addicted to things all over; things that are not worth associating with, things that kill the inner conscience and seers the innocence in us if at all there is any.
Growing up in some blocks of the streets aint easy, hearing the gun shots every night before retiring to bed is not so much fun, having an angry dad who will never say am sorry or I love u is not something you would pray for, homes becoming unbearable with the tears and screams from the innocent mum, horror laughter from the drunkard dad, and the squeaking of the scared little children. When will it all end, when will freedom knock at our doors.
“What did I do to God?’ this is always the question. You cry yourself to sleep, yet no one comes with the package of the so desired freedom. Living free, enjoying the natural pleasure of the sun, when will it come? Until when will this dehydration continue? We all start to seek freedom in our own ways, beat them or join them, entangle with the evil society, turn to be my drunkard father, bear bitterness as long as I live, and believing in everything else other than God.
We want to run away from it all, forget it never happened, become who we are not, live others’ purposes, but still there is no freedom. Bitterness bears its names on our foreheads; unforgiveness rule our hearts and revenge become the common syllable. We all want them to pay. They took away our freedom they ought to pay, “he stole my childhood, he must pay! he took away my innocence, that man took away my innocence, he deserves death!, the father I never knew, he abandoned me, left me in poverty, and the creator who took away my mum, she was the only hope of life but he took her away” … tears, rage, pain, bitterness seeking to devour me.
But freedom where is your light of hope, I have hated, cling on the past, revenged, why am I still in bondage, why can’t I be free? Am tired of all this please leave me alone, freedom, please come for me. Where are you and why am I burdened? Its not my fault that all this happened to me, I didn’t choose to be born of them, did I sent a letter requesting for this kind of life? Am through with you, if you can’t come for me, then I will do without you.
Pain rises, eats us alive, consumes us and in the end we are useless, still no freedom, still a slave of pain and anger, still succumbed in the arms unforgiveness. Freedom won’t come after all. I guess, I have to let it go, I desire freedom so let me surrender. Let all the pain be the things of the past, let the people who took me to hell in the present life not bother me anymore; they took a lot anyway, for how long will they rule my living. I want to be free, I free those that I had enslaved with my anger, and I surrender them to the one who truly understand my worth. I let it all go.
The past is behind me am not looking back; my past is gonna be a stepping stone to see a brighter future. I will no longer focus on the past, it has happen and I can’t change it, but see I can change my future, yes! I can change my future, I am free to change the future, I am free, I have freedom! Yes! finally freedom has come my way freedom at last, I will embrace this freedom, freedom to have a hope and a future, freedom to experience eternity. I Am changed am renewed, transformed in the likeness of Jesus who gives freedom.
Wake up let us journey on.
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